


When Snow Falls

by KuroNoKiseki



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Don't Like Don't Read, Heavy Angst, M/M, Rape, Victor and Yuuri living together in St. Petersburg, Yuuri dealing with hatred, Yuuri who appears cold outside, but actually is a cinnamon roll inside, snow symbolism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-26
Updated: 2017-12-26
Packaged: 2019-02-22 01:19:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,646
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13156131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KuroNoKiseki/pseuds/KuroNoKiseki
Summary: For stealing Victor from the rest of the world, Yuuri was one of the most controversial figure skaters known to man. Either loving to the core or hating him with a burning passion, there’s no in between.Some haters of him went too far.(Happy ending is guaranteed)





	When Snow Falls

Yuuri was sitting in the plane near the window, outside was nothing but the blue sky and clouds. He was bored, for being in the plane doing nothing for hours long since his departure from Japan. At that time, his phone vibrated and the sound of a new notification arrived was made. Yuuri checked it; it was a direct message sent to his Instagram account.

_Just stay away from Victor and retire already you dirty HOE! Or else I’ll slit your throat and let you die!_

Said the anonymous sender, but Yuuri didn’t bother to check who it was by viewing their profile. He already used to this kind of thing so it wasn’t a big deal. He nonchalantly placed his phone back and resumed gazing through the window. This wasn’t the first time the raven received a death threat anyway. Nothing big will happen if he chose to turn a blind eye against it.

“I really want a gold medal…”

He did win gold, but only from local competitions and never in internationals ones. He won gold from the latest Japan Nationals but to him it wasn’t enough. Getting to the first place while competing with other Japanese skaters wasn’t a challenge to him. Ah well, there’s still Worlds and Pyeongchang Olympics, more grandiose than the previous GPF where he won silver. There’s still a chance for him to win a more valuable gold medal.

“Victor, how are you doing now?”

After the GPF, Victor moved to Russia to resume training under Yakov, leaving Yuuri in Japan without a coach. That’s right; he fought in Japan Nationals alone by himself without a substitute coach to help him. As a result, days of separation between the two and today was supposed first meeting of them after so long. He couldn’t wait.

Yuuri had never experienced a flight very time-consuming like this before, or maybe it’s just because he was too eager to see Victor again. Once he set foot to the departure hall in the airport, the first few people he saw were some Russian skaters he knew before holding the banner written “Welcome to Russia, Yuuri Katsuki~!”.

Of course, Victor was one of them.

“Yuuri!”

In response, Yuuri ran towards the one who called to him. “Victor…!”

Victor spread his arms wide, for Yuuri to jump into his chest and hugging each other tight. It was so good to feel each others’ warmth and presence, hearing one another’s voices not from the phone once again. Yuuri buried his face into Victor’s strong pecs and deeply inhaled the Russian’s scent. Their height difference enabled Victor to easily plant a kiss on Yuuri’s forehead.

“Victor…” Yuuri started to tear up, “I missed you so much…”

“Me too, Yuuri. Me too…” Victor tightened the hug.

“I swear to God I missed Victor so much that I can’t I explain it with words.”

“Only that much? While I missed Yuuri to the point I feel like I’m dying every day.”

“Still, I think I missed Victor more. You have no idea how miserable I was during Japan Nationals.”

“Oh really? I won’t lose. I missed you more than how much you can ever miss me.”

“No, Victor! It’s me…!”

“Hurry up and save your stupid lovey-dovey melodrama for later dangit. I’m getting hungry,” Yurio interrupted them.

Normally when these two idiots were hugging it will take ages, and not to mention their super cringey acts of intimacy without minding other people around them. Having forgotten the presence of the other Russian skaters, Victor and Yuuri immediately broke the hug. The raven afterwards showed the recent gold medal he attained, for Victor to kiss it.

When Yuuri was walking with the group while chatting with them, something went flying into his direction. It crashed onto his head with a loud thud and left Yuuri with pain.

“Ow…!”

Yuuri rubbed his throbbing forehead, it was too painful. The thing which hit his head rolled on the floor by his feet, Yuuri eyed it to see what it was – it was a bottled water. An anxious Victor lifted Yuuri’s bangs to check if he was wounded, thankfully what only remained was a bump. There’s no way the bottle could fly by itself. It was thrown from somewhere within the crowd.

“Who did that?!”

Victor of course, was angry. Who wouldn’t? Someone had the nerves to hurt his beloved and he found it unforgivable despite unfit to be a grievous sin. No, his Yuuri shall not be hurt at whatever cost, he won’t allow even a scratch inflicted on him. The Russian looked around, nobody was admitting it.

“Answer me… Who did that to Yuuri?!”

When Victor couldn’t get any angrier over the lack of response from the crowd, Yuuri pulled his sleeves. “It’s okay, Victor! Please don’t mind it, now let’s go home…”

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“Vitya, I heard somebody threw a bottled water at Katsuki this morning?”

Yakov asked Victor out of curiosity, also expecting answers from the others if they had any. All of them sat at the same table at a café while Yuuri was off to the restroom. Yakov could guess the answer was yes, judging from Victor who was in a bad mood from the airport, turned even more glum when the question was brought out. Uh oh.

“Whoever did that seriously ruins my mood for today,” Victor clicked his tongue. “When I thought I will be very happy to meet Yuuri again…”

“And to think Japanese Yuri doesn’t seem to care about it. I wonder why?” Mila stirred her drink with the straw, watching the ice cubes swam in the sugary ocean.

Yurio took a bite of his food, his teeth loudly scraping the fork. “Katsudon’s always like that. He’s barely responsive when someone’s picking on him.”

The blond remembered it perfectly during their first and second encounter, the first was him kicking the door of a bathroom stall where the raven was in. The second one… well, Yurio did a spinning kick to Yuuri’s back and sent him flying, hitting face-flat on the counter. And trampling his face with his expensive Nike shoes where the latter should feel honoured to. Did Yuuri even fight back?

It’s Georgi’s turn to ask a question, “Come to think of it, has anybody seen Katsuki getting mad before?”

The group fell into silence, only the chatters of the other patrons in the café could be heard. All directed their gazes towards Victor, but the Russian seemed equally lost at words. How unbelievable, to think he was supposed to know it more than anyone else. It was not expected of Georgi to be keen enough to notice it first.

“Now you’ve mentioned it… I think there’s a time where Yuuri yelled at me, but if I recalled perfectly it’s just a “HUH?!” and nothing else??” Victor scratched his head. “Yeah, that’s the only time I’ve seen him angry!”

“What a doormat.” Yurio said while munching on his food.

Mila placed her half-eaten burger down and sighed. “Did he even read what people are saying about him in the Internet, then…?”

Victor shook his head. “He doesn’t, I think. He’s not really active in social media you know. Well, when he does read them he usually didn’t say anything.”

Everyone knew what caused the strong hatred Yuuri had received, mainly from Victor’s die-hard fans. Even when now Victor had made his comeback in competitive figure skating, the hatred was going on strong much to the silver-waned man’s dismay. Given Victor’s position as both a competitor and a coach, he cannot be by Yuuri’s side all the time to protect him this time.

Lilia who was silent all this time began to speak. “That young man surely has one hell of tolerance. Yuri, you should learn from him how to control your temper.”

“You two have the same name but the difference in your personalities is like fire and ice.” Yakov noted.

Georgi raised an eyebrow. “Who’s the fire and who’s the ice?”

Yurio just spat out the kale stuck in his teeth, pretending to not hearing anything. Victor heard his student was praised by Lilia, but he was confused on whether he should feel proud or disappointed as Yuuri’s perseverance towards others served as a double-edged sword for him. They changed the topic once the person in mention returned to his seat.

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_“Excuse me, may I pass?”_

_A group of threatening boys were lining up in front of Yuuri. Holding books in his arms, he was on his way to class from the library but stopped by these boys. From how they were looking at him, obviously they were up to something not good. What made them scary-looking was their advantage in size that Yuuri couldn’t match with his lean structure._

_“Hey there, girly boy.”_

_Yuuri didn’t see any chance to escape, the boys were crowding around him without leaving an opening. One of the boys snorted. “Say, I keep seeing you in television these days. Our country’s hero, eh?”_

_“He can’t be a hero! Did you see how he skates? It’s too effeminate; he’s not being manly at all!”_

_“You’re right,” One boy caressed Yuuri’s cheek with the back of his hand. “Look at how fair and smooth your skin is. If only you’re a girl, you’ll be really cute. What a waste on a boy like you.”_

_The raven clenched the books in his arms tight. He tried to not look at them; instead he stared downwards towards his shoes where it’s the only direction where those boys were not in sight. At a sudden, he was pushed down, falling on the ground and lost grip on his books. The books scattered around as Yuuri painfully fell on his bottom._

_“Look, he’s a weakling! I’m only using one hand and he can be toppled this easily.”_

_“I don’t get what makes the girls so into you,” the most intimidating of them grabbed Yuuri by the collar, “when all your girly manners make me wanna puke.”_

_He glared at Yuuri straight into his eyes, but the raven seemed to be not faltering in any least. No signs of fear, not a hint of anger or sadness, neither a defensive act was put up in response. Instead, he was only being Yuuri – the stone-faced Ice Prince who was infamously known for his icy cold exterior to the point nobody could ever approach him._

_“Why don’t we try taking him somewhere and strip him, then?” One boy suggested out of blue._

_Another boy snapped his fingers. “Great idea! Now we can see if he’s having a dick or not down there.”_

_“To think I also brought my sister’s sailor uniform today. We should make him wear it!”_

_The boys howled in delight at such idea. They crowded around the trapped Yuuri closer, two of them grabbed the raven by the arm and forced him to stand up. Yuuri tried to break free from their grip, up to no avail. Yuuri opened his mouth to shout, but before he did somebody else shouted instead._

_“Hold it right there!”_

_All averted their gaze towards the direction of the voice. The boys became panicked. “Gah! It’s Nishigori!”_

_Takeshi was only standing there, crossing his arms and the boys fled from the scene. Yuuri was amazed, only by looking at his childhood friend here scared the bullies away. Quite a reputation Takeshi had there, though not as much as Yuuri’s popularity in the school. Both of them was relieved to see each other, Takeshi for stopping them and Yuuri being unharmed._

_“Yuuri, if they’re bullying you again, feel free to call for my help okay?”_

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During high school, Yuuri was indirectly turning down Takeshi’s offer for help.

That wasn’t the only time he was bullied. Yet, Yuuri had never asked for Takeshi’s help during that time. Thank goodness he didn’t get hurt seriously by his bullies but God knew whatever the mischief they did to him every time and how it was affecting him, which he refused to show as if nothing ever happened to him.

Takeshi and Yuuko were reading through some fan posts and social media – which they deeply regretted.

**THREAD:  Anti Yuuri Katsuki**

**bunnybunnybunbun:**

You know, I could write a thesis on why Katsuki should’ve retired.

**Nanasama97:**

He’s too selfish for fuckeroo’s sake! First he made Victor stop skating and unable to participate in GPF, now with his comeback he still want Victor to coach him again?! How can Victor balance skating and coaching at the same time??? That is too much for him! You really want to send Vitya to hospital eh, Katsuki???

**MrsVictorNikiforov:**

Right??? He should leave my Vitya alone! Dx And the quad flip should be Vitya’s signature move only!

**skatinggeek:**

I didn’t watch this season’s GPF since Victor’s not competing. Any competitions without Victor should’ve been cancelled

**Tiki Tiki:**

I can’t imagine a figure skating season without Victor. I mean, he is the king and nobody skates like him

**b l a h b l a h:**

It makes me sadder to think Victor missed this GPF’s gold thanks to him. This could’ve been his 6th victory orz

**mclarawilsonz:**

I don’t get the hype around him and the relationship between him and Victor. I mean, Victor’s his coach! How unethical for a student to date his own teacher!!

**Pomeepom:**

Katsuki is sooo overrated tbh. His rise in popularity now is undeserved, unlike Vitya and Yuratchka who always work hard for the sake of Russia. What even Katsuki got? A coach to baby him around. I don’t think he deserved the silver which Chris should instead.

**lol lol lol lol:**

#Chrisgotrobbed #silver4Chris #Katsuckyisoverrated

**GrandmaFoxy777:**

Speaking about Chris, I think he’s the one better suited for Victor so they should end up together instead. Katsuki and Victor have zero chemistry and make a bland couple compared to Victor and Chris who complement each other perfectly and both are equally sexy

**Victor’sgoldmedals:**

Let’s pray for Katsuki to not win any gold medals in the future even if he landed a quintuple axel, his skating is garbage. Just give the golds to either Vitya or Yuratchka as they are better skaters.

**Cheese_and_Ham:**

Vitya and Yuratchka can whoop his ass anytime!

**AAA#1stan:**

Anyway I DON’T WANT HIM IN RUSSIA! JUST GO BACK TO JAPAN AND BE A GEISHA OR SOMETHING!!!

“Why fandoms are so cancerous?”

Takeshi furrowed his brows and gritted his teeth. His face was red from containing his rage, or else he’s going to break the phone into pieces. Yuuko sighed. She patted her husband’s back, “whose fandom do you think it is, anyway?”

Of course, Victor’s fans were the loudest in the figure skating community and also known for being the most vicious of all fanbases. Though there are many fans of Victor loved Yuuri as well, some of his other fans were the major contributors for Yuuri’s hate groups which grew in number fast like how the plague spread.

“They really had a lot of valuable time to waste. Can’t they just leave Yuuri alone? He didn’t do anything wrong!”

“These guys certainly are people with the thickest heads. I feel bad for Yuuri-kun.”

Loop peeped into the phone Takeshi was holding.  “But we’ve never heard Yuuri saying anything about his haters. He’s not angry at what they said about him?”

Takeshi sighed, reminded of the time he told Yuuri to ask for his help if somebody’s bullying him again – which the latter _didn’t._

“Well, he’s always been like that.”

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“There’s a girl in school who’s hated by everyone.”

Said Alina, Mila’s little sister during a break from skating practice. Alina’s story piqued Mila’s interest. “Why does everybody hate her?”

“It’s because she is taking drugs,” Alina shook her head in dismay. “She’s always skipping class nowadays.”

“Really?!” Mila was shocked. Of course the girl in mention was the same age as Alina, who was currently competing in junior division.

“Everyone’s dismissing her and calling her a bitch. One day when she tripped on the ground nobody offered to help her.”

“That’s not right, Alina.” Mila attentively looked at her sister in the eyes. “To hate someone who didn’t do anything to you is wrong.”

“But she’s doing drugs –“

Mila cut her, “Even with her mistakes, she doesn’t deserve that treatment you guys did to her. She had never hurt you before, right?”

Alina was lost in words.

“Listen, Alina. Everyone makes mistakes as nobody is perfect. No matter how hard you try, you’ll never exempt from making mistakes. Instead of hating her, why don’t you do something to help her then?” the redhead suggested.

“How?” Alina asked.

“Try and decide with your friends on what should you all do to help her. I’m sure she’ll stop doing drugs after some time.” Mila raised a thumb up. “Also, there ought to be a reason why she’s doing drugs. Why don’t you try and ask her?”

“Remember, it’s not good to hate someone for no appropriate reason. It’s so easy to hate someone these days, and hate can cause you to hurt innocent people, you know?”

Alina tilted her head in confusion, “Why we can’t hate others?”

“Because we must treat each other the way we want to be treated, it’s one of our rights as a human being. If you see others as a trash or idolizing them too much – you’re dehumanizing them either way.” Mila said after clearing her throat.

Mila was talking from her experience as a competitive figure skater. Or to put it more accurately, a _public figure_. Of course, she had dealt with both love and hatred, fame and stigma, admiration and abhorrence, but well it’s a price to pay when you were known by everyone. Surely with high reputation you’ll be on a pedestal – but also the same pedestal that will set you apart from others to the brink of loneliness.

The redhead brushed her hair to the back of her ear. “You know what’s the worst thing of being famous, Alina?”

“What is it?” Her sister asked.

“You’ll be constantly judged.”

While the sisters were talking, Yuuri passed by them looking very frantic. Mila and Alina stopped their conversation and averted their gazes towards him. The raven’s eyes were scanning throughout the places as if he was searching for something. Much to the girls’ puzzlement, Yuuri was on his skate guards.

“What’s wrong, Yuuri?” Mila asked, her female instincts could tell something is wrong.

“I can’t find my shoes,” Yuuri replied, “I can’t walk home without it!”

Alina also asked, “Didn’t you always put your shoes in your locker? How could you lose them, then?”

“Right??? Man, what an unlucky day… Silly me…” Yuuri whined. He sat at a corner and curled into a ball, a dark aura surrounded him. Mila and Alina looked at him with a large sweat dropping down their heads.

Yurio saw the whole thing. Stupid Katsudon, he thought to himself. At the same time, he overheard some male skaters in the nearest restroom laughing at the raven, insulting him. Yurio was pissed, he’s the only one allowed to insult Yuuri and no one else. Then he also heard the guys talking about his shoes and suddenly the trash bin was mentioned.

“Did I just hear my Yuuri in existential crisis?!” Victor suddenly appeared out of nowhere in a blink of eye, much to Mila and Alina’s surprise. “Coach Victor to the rescue!”

“Hey, Vitya! Get back here you son of a gun!” Yakov yelled from the ice. Victor ignored him and rushed to his fiancé.

“Victor…” Yuuri was still comically depressed, “I lost my shoes…”

“Aww, but it’s okay! I’ll buy you a new pair, I hate those unfashionable shoes anyway!” Victor patted Yuuri’s back. “Man Yuuri but you do have poor taste in fashion.”

“Don’t say that, I like those shoes…”

“Victor, the problem is that Yuuri can’t walk home barefoot.” Mila pointed out the actual issue here.

“Yuuri…” Victor cupped Yuuri’s chin and tenderly caressed the raven’s lips with his thumb. “I’ll carry you to our home in that case. Then we’ll go out shopping for new shoes, my treat.”

Yuuri’s eyes were locked in a contact with Victor’s, he blushed in return. “Victor…”

“Do you want a piggyback ride or a princess carry? My pleasure.”

“Oi, Katsudon!!!” Yurio barged in, interrupting the couple’s intimate moment. He threw a pair of old and tattered shoes in front of Yuuri.

“It’s my shoes!! Where did you find it??” Yuuri beamed in happiness, “Thank you so much, Yurio! You’re a lifesaver!”

“I found it in the trash bin.”

Yurio quickly stole a glance at those naughty male skaters, _who were actually the culprit._ Some people were unhappy with Yuuri’s presence here and these guys were one of them. One of them clicked his tongue in fury; another one slammed his fist to the wall. Some of them glared at Yurio, but the young Russian wasn’t scared of them. Yurio had destroyed their wicked plan to bully Yuuri, he smirked at them in triumph.

“Aw shucks.” Victor pouted. “Way to ruin the moment, Yurio.”

“Eh? How did my shoes end up in the trash bin?” Yuuri confusedly asked, while taking off the skates and putting on his shoes.

Victor was still pouting. “Perhaps the janitor threw it away? Because it’s too worn out and I hate it.”

Yurio directly stared into Yuuri’s eyes, crossing his arms.

“Don’t forget to lock your locker next time, Katsudon.”

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“Yuuri.”

Victor looked over his shoulder to see Yuuri sitting on the couch with his phone, probably playing games. The raven replied without looking away from his phone. “What is it, Victor?”

“Have you checked your accounts lately in the Internet?”

The silver-waned Russian resumed browsing the net through the laptop. Of course, he was looking at the brand new comments recently popped in Yuuri’s Instagram account and the more he saw them the more dead bodies he’d like to pile up. This was getting out of control; he must do something to stop all this.

“Well, I usually don’t.” he replied, did notice the peculiar tone in Victor’s voice but he wasn’t assuming anything. “What about them?”

 “I think it’s time for me to moderate your accounts. I’ll block these nasty people from harassing you further.” Victor slowly sighed.

Yuuri knitted his brows. “You can’t, that’s violation of my privacy.”

“I’m sorry, Yuuri but I had to!” Victor raised his voice out of intention. “I can’t bear to see what people said about you anymore…!”

“Just ignore what they said. As if any other skaters besides me didn’t get any haters to pester them. That includes you too, Victor. I don’t see them as a problem.”

The same old Katsuki Yuuri who in general doesn’t seem to give a darnation about other things in life other than skating, katsudon and games. Victor was disappointed, but he was not surprised with his fiancé. Not that he was not fond of this attitude of him, but it’s not the problem here –Victor was just concerned of Yuuri’s current image and safety.

“But none of us had as far as a water bottle being thrown at us! It’s actually involving your wellbeing so it’s definitely a problem!”

Victor mentioned the airport incident and Yuuri’s poker face remained. Oh God, even though Yuuri can be very emotional which Victor knew enough, but at certain times this coach of his was left confusedly questioning if the raven did actually possess a heart.  Normally people will be enraged if they were treated badly by others, unless if they were a Yuuri.

“I’m thinking about hiring you a bodyguard,” Victor finally opened his mouth after a long silence between the two.

This time Yuuri peeled his eyes from his phone and looked at Victor straight in the eyes. “You can’t, Victor. You’re already spending a lot of money to cover my figure skating expenses; there’s no way you can spend more money for a bodyguard. That’s too much for me.”

“Stop being like this, Yuuri! I’m doing this because I’m worried about you!” Victor slammed his fist on the table. “This is not Japan and I can’t be there with you all the time now!”

“There’s no need. I can take care of myself.”

“That’s not something wise you can come up with. Just how selfish you can be, Yuuri?!” Victor caught Yuuri’s shoulders into his hands and gripped them tight, confronting him.

Yuuri widened his eyes and caught off guard by Victor’s dominating force, now his expressionless façade withered as the Russian’s angry eyes put him into a trap. “It’s not wrong to ignore others, but at least you can’t just let yourself being trampled all the time and you’re not doing anything to prevent it!”

Yesterday Takeshi gave Victor a call and they discussed the matter about Yuuri’s vicious haters, to the point of potentially causing him harm but Yuuri refused to talk further about it. He’d just prefer not to do anything and pretend it never happened. Then Takeshi told Victor about Yuuri’s past, where he was bullied and supposed to get Takeshi’s help – but he didn’t.

“You can’t always be a coward and run away from your problems like this, Yuuri! This is for your own good!”

Yuuri was taken aback by Victor’s reproach. He broke the eye contact and looked down to his lap, hiding his eyes underneath his dark bangs. Victor was also surprised by Yuuri’s subtle change in his gestures; the raven began uncontrollably shaking due to an undecipherable emotion. Was it anger? Fear? Disappointment? Sadness?

“…Do you think I’ve never cared about things people say when it comes to me?”

The raven roughly brushed Victor’s hands away from him and the tables were turned. Yuuri stared at Victor with glassy eyes, miraculously able to show vulnerability but also power at the same time – now Victor was the one faltering. With Yuuri’s single glare he was infamous for, due to its deadliness despite was formed by a pair of innocent doe eyes; the one in control was easily switched.

“Well, do you, Victor?!”

The shocked Victor was left speechless. Now it’s Yuuri’s turn to do all the talking.

“I know it all along… That I’m just nothing but a nuisance to you…” Yuuri stuttered. “I do take their words to heart!”

Nuisance? No, it can’t be… “Yuuri…”

“Thanks to me that your fans had to bear with a season without you. I’m the reason why you can’t enjoy competitive skating anymore… So, it is why I had considered retiring – for the sake of letting you go so the world can have you back.”

The raven mentioned about the time they had a fight for the first time, in the hotel room before the end of this season’s GPF. Victor was crumbling inside, when he thought Yuuri was being very cruel and heartless back then, but it turned out he only was doing it out of concern for him. In fact, the skate-loving Yuuri was trying to make a too-hard of a sacrifice for him and Victor wholly misjudged the raven.

“Now it’s good that you’re back, but it doesn’t stop there. I’m doing this for your sake, and you had the nerves to call me a coward…?”

The shapeless embodiment secretly bottled inside Yuuri’s heart for a long time slowly took form and revealed its true self – escaping from his eyes and dribbled down his cheeks, a stifled sob followed after. From afar it resembled tiny little diamonds, but to Victor it was a raging giant hailstorm ready to devour him alive.

“I’ve never stop thinking on how I should do to not be a burden to you.” Yuuri wept more, “But no matter how hard I tried, it’ll never be enough.”

The raven was the one crying, but Victor was the one hurting more inside. He wished Yuuri would stop talking already but he had to listen – Yuuri was opening himself to him now. It’s what Victor wanted anyway, the raven showing the emotions he supposed to have while facing this situation and taking it more seriously… Victor painfully regretted it. He forgot how easily it was to break Yuuri’s heart.

“So that’s why I chose to ignore them, at least I’m not being overly dependent on you all the time! If I can’t tolerate them, then I am not strong enough! I hate when people say I’m a no-good when you’re not around, so at some times I need know how to take care of myself and solve my own problems! So I can’t always rely on you!”

Yuuri’s throat hurt from the yelling, so he started to speak in a lower tone. “So you want me to give a damn about my haters? Now I showed you I do. And you want me to do something about it? I am, but I’m doing it in my own way without getting you involved. And I’m able to live just fine till now.”

“Are you happy now, Victor…?”

Victor expected nothing from coaching Yuuri but to stay by his side forever.

But it seemingly was a sin too grievous to be forgiven. In result, Victor lacked more free time than usual and he got tired more easily now thanks to the truckload of skating practices and coaching Yuuri at the same time. Noticing this, Yuuri tried his best not to be a burden to him or it’ll only add in more problems for the Russian. It placed a great amount of pressure upon the raven and now the whole world hating him.

What should they do to put an end to this?

“Yuuri…” Victor wiped Yuuri’s tears with his fingers, then he kissed the raven’s soaked cheek. “I’m sorry.”

More tears fell down everytime Yuuri blinked. He hated to get his loved ones involved in his problems, same like how he refused to get Takeshi’s help when he was bullied during high school – _he doesn’t want to be seen as weak_. He wanted to prove he could face those bullies by himself, and he managed to survive. Yes, he can be strong and independent.

“I’m always afraid to show my tears to others. People say, tears are a sign of weakness.” Yuuri dabbed his eyes with his sleeve. “That’s why; I don’t want to think more about it. I don’t want to be hurt.”

“And I don’t know how to stop once I started crying. I’d rather not to cry at all.”

Sensitive people existed in two types – the first one were the literal drama queens who were very expressive of their feelings even over the smallest things. The other chose to hide their feelings and bottle them deep inside their heart, often misunderstood by others as being cold, callous and insensitive when in truth it was the complete opposite.

It’s only because they didn’t want people to see them as weak, or being expressive will only lead their feelings out of control – making them hurt more in result.

Victor pulled Yuuri into an embrace; in hope it’ll make him feel better. “You’re not weak, in fact it’s the other way around. I’m sorry; I didn’t mean to say that to you.”

Yuuri pushed Victor away and stood up. The latter thought he was heading to his room to sleep, until the raven showed up in a coat and a muffler around his neck. He made his way to the front door and was putting on his shoes. Obviously he was going to leave the house.  He already had stopped crying, but the bloodshot eyes of his remained.

“Yuuri… Where are you going?”

“I need some fresh air,” Yuuri opened the door and grabbed his skates. “I’ll be back before 12.”

There’s nothing could be done. Victor knew he shouldn’t try too hard to make Yuuri less sad, (especially when he was the one who caused the problem here) since only the raven can decide what’s better for himself, remembering of what happened in the garage during Cup of China. If it’s to make the situation better, then everything was beyond his hands.

The silver-waned sadly watched his beloved closing the door, leaving him behind.

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_Is Russia had always been this cold?_

Yet, this wasn’t Yuuri’s first time being in this land of the Tsars, or maybe he wasn’t used to spend several days living here, and his skin wasn’t accustomed to the weather yet. It’s different than in Japan and it’s even colder here, he noticed his tendency to catch a cold these days was higher. Taking a deep breath, he rubbed his palms altogether and exhaled at them to get himself warm. He should’ve brought gloves or mittens along before going outside.

Some hot coffee would be nice. Yuuri scanned the area for a vending machine, but none appeared in his field of vision. He was disappointed. He walked and kept on searching. Now, what he found wasn’t the desired object, but grabbed his attention nevertheless. A young girl below the age of ten was on her knees, softly crying.

“What’s wrong, little miss?”

Yuuri crouched next to her, patting her hair out of sympathy. The crying girl was hesitant at first, then she started talking after hindered by several hiccups. She said in a broken English, “My Mama supposed to pick me up now but she didn’t show up… I want to go home but I’m scared…”

It’ll be dangerous for a little girl like this to be left alone by herself in the dark at this hour. Not to mention the lack of people on the street, so anything could happen to this poor, defenceless child. As an adult, he felt it was his responsibility to do what he thought he should. That was, to help the girl and guide her to safety.

“Do you know where your home is?” Yuuri grabbed her hand and held it in his. “I’ll walk you home, then.”

With teary eyes, she looked at Yuuri who smiled kindly at her which made her stop crying. She clenched his hand back and led the way, whereas Yuuri just obediently followed whenever she go without a word. At the same time the raven looked around, in case anything that can potentially harm the girl was going to appear out of nowhere.

At a corner of a deserted place where it was quite far away from the city, where nobody else was seen and it were mostly brick walls – where Yuuri and the girl were now. The Japanese looked around in puzzlement, after the girl released his hand and stood beside him still. This doesn’t seem to be where someone would live, unless the homeless.

“Why did you stop walking?” Yuuri asked. “We’re not at your home yet. You wanted to go there, don’t you?”

The girl was unable to look at Yuuri straight in the face. Without saying anything, she hid her hands behind her back and stared down at her shoes. When Yuuri was about to ask more questions, suddenly he was pushed from behind and fell on the ground, then he was unable to get up and his limbs were pinned down, restricting his movements.

“Hey there, Katsuki.”

A man’s voice slapped Yuuri’s ears, and he was restrained by more men behind him. He tried to brush them off but he was no match for their combined strength. Yuuri saw the man who greeted him speaking in Russian with the girl, with his limited knowledge of the language he couldn’t comprehend what he was saying.

“Good job for bringing him here, girl. Here’s your pay.”

The girl reluctantly received the high amount of cash the man offered; casted a tearful look to Yuuri before running away as far as her feet could carry her. Oh, now Yuuri got it. It was all just an act. The girl was paid by these guys to lure him here; her being an innocent-looking child so Yuuri wouldn’t get suspicious. What a dirty tactic indeed.

“Let go of me!” Yuuri exclaimed, the hands holding were too strong that he could barely move his limbs. “I said let go!”

Asking them to let him go was pointless. Instead, he tried to scream at top of his lungs in hope a passerby or someone living nearby could hear him. “Somebody, help me!!!”

“Yeah, shout as much as you want kiddo. Nobody’s hearing you.”

“Why are you doing this to me?!” Yuuri angrily glared at them. “What do you want from me?!”

“Oh nothing, we just wanted to have fun with you~”

One of them pinched Yuuri’s nose, his survival instincts to breathe forced his mouth open.  A man opened a bottled water and poured the clear water in it into Yuuri’s open mouth. With the water making its way through Yuuri’s throat in large volume that it choked him, some leaked out from his mouth and soaked his shirt.

It stopped once the plastic bottle became empty; Yuuri coughed heavily after being forced to drink without pauses and gasped for air. Some of the water dripped down his chin mixed with his drools. Most of the men were still pinning him down; one man was looking at his phone and set the timer up.

“How long are we going to wait???” One impatient man clicked his tongue.

Still looking at his phone, “it shouldn’t be that long. About five minutes to take effect, I think?”

“Wha –“

Yuuri opened his mouth to ask, but no words came out as at a sudden his whole body became hot and burning everywhere, his energy quickly depleted until nothing was left. His limbs were too heavy as if they were made of metal, and his field of vision became blurry to the point of becoming blind. He was no longer pinned to the ground, but it made no difference since he still couldn’t move.

“Now be a good boy, eh Katsuki?” A man stroked his hair in a gentle, yet sickening manner. “We’re going to show you something fun.”

The water Yuuri was forced to swallow was spiked with some kind of a drug, which he didn’t notice. Now it’s less of a burden for the men to keep him from escaping, he lost his ability to resist them and now whatever they wanted to do with him absolutely was going to happen. If murdering him was the thing they planned, then it’s not impossible.

“Do it.”

One of the thugs turned on his camcorder, another threw packets of condom onto the floor and the rest brandished their knives to cut each articles of Yuuri’s clothing into torn pieces of fabric. It went on with Yuuri unable to stop them until the raven was completely naked, laying defenceless on the ground as the hungry eyes watched his vulnerable form in lust.

“You’re so beautiful, not only your face but your body as well.”

“God, I’m already hard here. He looks better when he’s naked.” The standing guy agreed.

A man sighed, touching Yuuri’s milky satin-smooth skin. “Just like a doll. A perfect doll for me to put my dick in.”

“Too bad a pretty face is the only good thing he has,” the man beside Yuuri grabbed the raven by the hair and kissed him. “Damn his lips delicious.”

_No._

Too many were touching him at several places either with their hands, mouths or tongues, all happening at the same time. What made him grew more restless when he felt something warm and moist touching his entrance and wiggling its way into his insides, he wanted to scream but what came out was a moan they found erotic and tempting them more.

_Stop it._

“Let me go first.”

_Don’t touch me._

He put on the condom as the others waited for their turns, whilst having their hands in their pants to make themselves hard as preparation. He stabbed deep into Yuuri’s tight, unprepared entrance without lube applied, the raven loudly screamed due to how hurt it was. He groaned like a wild animal, Yuuri’s hot inner walls were tightly engulfing him.

_Help me._

“Ahh, fuck!!!” He shouted, placing Yuuri’s legs around his waist. “Feels so fucking good…!”

_I’m scared._

The man inside Yuuri roughly moved to pleasure himself, his movements were too rough unlike Victor who gently held him in bed, Yuuri found it too painful and not to mention, _disgusting._ The raven couldn’t bear to look at the rapist’s face so he turned his face away, feeling utterly nauseous and sick. It hurt him so much; tears began to trickle down his cheeks.

One man forced Yuuri’s mouth open and thrusted his length into it, now the raven was violated at both front and behind. “Make sure you suck my dick real good, you little slut.”

_I’m scared._

_“Okaa-san, don’t leave me here! I’m scared!”_

_The three-year old Yuuri was hugging Hiroko’s leg tight, not letting her go. Today was the first day of ballet class with Minako, but Yuuri was frightened to be left there at the studio without his mother and meeting many strangers, bunches of kids that were older than him. He desperately hid behind Hiroko’s back for safety._

_“Aww, Yuuri! You’ll going to be fine, come here sweetie~” Minako tried to pull Yuuri closer, but the child clenched to his mother and not letting her go._

_Hiroko stroked Yuuri’s hair to console him. “Yuuri, I promise I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be at the back there watching you. Minako-sensei will treat you kindly, okay?”_

_“No!!! I’m scared!!!”_

_Yuuri began to cry, Hiroko picked him up and hugged him, gently patting his back as he cried into her chest. Mari chuckled at how much of a momma’s boy her brother was, and Minako was equally puzzled of what she had to do to make Yuuri less scared of her and the others. It can’t be helped; the child was still too young._

_I’m scared._

He pulled his length out from Yuuri’s mouth and squirted his seeds at the raven’s face. The other pulled out, took off the used condom and came all over his victim’s body. Yuuri was choked by the man deepthroating him, he coughed before throwing up bile on the ground, due to both nausea and gag reflex. The immense pain was no longer there, he felt relieved.

“My turn.”

He had taken only the first guy just now, and more people were waiting for their turn. Another pain followed as the second guy slammed hard into him, Yuuri felt his body was going to break already. Thank goodness this guy was quick to achieve his orgasm, after a few thrusts he pulled out and the next guy claimed his turn, much to Yuuri’s horror.

“How sexy… You should sell your body for living after retirement… Oh fuck…”

_I’m scared._

_“Hey Katsuki, would you like to go out for lunch with us? It’s our treat.”_

_A group of boys which were Yuuri’s classmates stood before him. They all looked kind, but their kindness intimidated him. He doesn’t deserve this. “I’m sorry; I have skating practice after this.”_

_“Oh…” the boy invited him was clearly sad at Yuuri’s rejection. “You can’t cancel it? Only for today?”_

_“Come on buddy, I think you’re working too hard. Just skipping for a day won’t hurt.”_

_“I’m sorry…” was the only thing Yuuri could say._

_These boys only wanted to know him better and befriend him, as they did admire him for being Japan’s ace skater at such young age. But Yuuri was scared – what if he wasn’t a great company to them? Outside of skating he thought he was just a dull and plain guy, and of course they were going to be disappointed. There’s a lot of people better than him out there._

_“Guys, he’s busy and this is for the sake of our country,” one boy nagged. “We shouldn’t force him if he doesn’t want to.”_

_He patted Yuuri at the back. “Next time if you’re less busy, then don’t forget to inform us. We’d still love to hang out with you someday. Okay?”_

_“Good luck for the next competition. Make sure you bring home a gold medal!”_

_They were too kind. Why…?_

_I’m scared._

Today Yuuri had to feel like how it was to have sex with countless people at the same day. Different positions were tried, and they have different preferences each. One preferred to come inside his mouth, the other preferred to come at his face, one liked to pull his hair as he was shifted into a doggy style position. And some other people liked to bite him at places.

The one pounding him now wasn’t wearing a condom. He thrusted, and came inside him, sending pain across Yuuri’s stomach. And this wasn’t the end of it, there’s more to go.

“I wanna try something. Just watch!”

He pulled Yuuri up by the arm, and positioned the raven above the lengths of his and another guy. Both were forced into Yuuri’s entrance at the same time, making him experiencing multiple amount of pain and he felt his insides were going to tear up. Yuuri cried in pain, tears nonstop flowing out of his eyes, the other guys laughed while watching him being tormented further.

“Amazing… He can take two at once!”

“Well, he’s an athlete. His body is strong enough for this.”

_I’m scared._

_“Announcing the next skater, representing Japan – Yuuri Katsuki.”_

_Alone by himself stood Yuuri at the middle of the ice, this was the first time he had a competition outside his home country. He only had his coach with him; while this time none of his family and friends were there to support him. As this was his international debut and the world was still unfamiliar with him, he no longer heard the wild cheers from his fans like in Japan._

_He was more nervous than usual. He was trembling and his heart throbbed hard without stopping. Thousands of eyes were eerily watching him in silence, ready to cast an unkind look if he did a mistake. Oh no. He can’t do wrong here. The pride of Japan was on his shoulders. He shouldn’t let his beloved ones down. He shall not betray their expectations._

_He was no different from a tiny, powerless herbivore and the audience were a pack of wolves baring their sharp fangs at him. He was their prey, waiting to pounce at him when he was least expecting, tearing his body into pieces, biting onto his juicy flesh and drinking his fresh blood just like red wine. A single bite can easily make his bones shatter into pieces._

_It’s a world of either to eat or to be eaten._

_Oh no. What if he flubbed a jump? What if he slipped when attempting a twizzle? What if he fell when he was doing a flying spin? No, no. What if he couldn’t skate a perfect program after all? How was he going to face his country when he failed? What was he going to say to them when he had promised to get a place on the podium? What, how, why? What should he do?_

_Of course, he was Japan’s best skater. But this was outside of Japan. How many skaters here were actually more skilled than him? He had worked so hard… and this was not enough?_

_I’m scared._

Yuuri’s stamina had limits too. When things were going on and on without signs of stopping, he began to tearfully beg them, “please, stop…! I can’t bear with this anymore…!”

“Why don’t you just beg for your mama, eh boy? You poor little baby.”

“I’m… I’m scared…” Yuuri’s lips quivered, “Please, just kill me already…! Just let this be over with…!”

“You’re scared, huh? Aww…”

They ignored him. They continued what they were doing, and taking turns. Yuuri wondered if he had reached the last one among them, he doesn’t know. His body was already numb from the pain they caused him, and he doesn’t know how long he could keep going anymore.  He slowly closed his swollen and puffy eyes, followed by fresh new tears falling down his face.

If having a sweet dream was the happiest thing he could get after this, then he wanted to fall asleep – forgetting everything that happened. _Please, don’t let the pain last long_ , he silently prayed.

_I’m scared._

_I’m too scared._

_Everyone in this world – I’m scared of them all._

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Yuuri promised he would come back before 12.

But where was he now? Victor started to get worried. Makkachin seemed to be troubled as well, she circled around the place and occasionally whined. Checking the time, it was nearing 12 AM at midnight. Victor tried to call him via phone, but Yuuri wasn’t picking up. This made him very uneasy. Was Yuuri doing fine out there?

“Should we go and search for him, Makkachin?”

Makkachin snuggled closer, buried her head into Victor’s chest. Judging from her actions, the large dog was unquestionably sad. Then, she pulled Victor’s shirt with her mouth, as if urging him to get up and search for Yuuri already. Victor smiled, stroking her head. He stood up, grabbed his keys and put on his coat.

His phone rang. Phichit was calling.

_“Victor, help!”_

“Hello, Phichit?” Victor answered the call. “What’s going on?”

_“Yuuri! It’s Yuuri…!”_

Phichit sniffed on the line. Victor could tell something was wrong, what alarmed him was at the mention of Yuuri. His Yuuri. The Thai skater was obviously crying, this meant bad news. “Yuuri?! What’s happening to him?!”

_“Yuuri… Yuuri is…”_

The horror being done to Yuuri was too much for the devastated Phichit to describe it in words. Since he was too active in social media, he got to know almost everything happening in the figure skating world – even the nastiest ones. Phichit abruptly ended the call, when Victor looked at his phone a message was already sent by the former.

Victor clicked on the message to find a YouTube link. “What… is this…?”

It was a private video, meaning it won’t be available for the public and only certain people can get access by sharing links. It was a stream and still currently going on. The video was lagging as he was using mobile data, when he shifted his eyes to the chat section beside; he found nothing but disturbing comments. All written in Russian.

_How hot. How Eros!_

_Suits him right._

_What a good video to fap._

_Damn my boner._

_Can I join? Haha_

_A dirty whore getting what he deserved._

The video buffered a bit and continued playing. Several man crowding around something, no, it’s someone. From what they were doing, they were engaging a gangrape. So that’s why it was private, this was deep-web level of crime. Raping someone by turns and filming it, posting it online. How disturbing.  Their faces were blurry, but anyone could clearly see the victim’s face.

“Yuuri…?”

They were doing things shall not be done on his treasured lover. His beloved Yuuri was there, enduring the pain they caused him and Victor was not approving of whatever happening before his eyes. He unconsciously questioned in his mind – _why Yuuri? Why hurting his precious Yuuri? What Yuuri had done to deserve this? Stop it. Stop touching him. Get your dirty hands off from my Yuuri._

 _“Please, just kill me already…! Just let this be over with…!”_ said Yuuri in the video, tears visibly streaming down his cheeks as he begged them.

_Why murder is a sin if it’s for someone you love?_

Swinging his arm, the phone went flying from his hand and crashed onto the nearest wall with a loud thud, it went black and the screen was cracked. The casing broke and the battery fell out from the phone. Was it still usable? Only God knows. The sound made Makkachin jump, she looked at the face Victor was making now, and immediately turned away out of fear after seeing something potentially can invoke nightmares. She had never been so scared.

“Unforgivable,” Victor gritted his teeth. “I won’t forgive you bastards.”

In his head, Yuuri was smiling. To him, Yuuri’s smile is the sun. The smile that gave him warmth and energy, shining his life brightly – just like the sun. With all he had he swore to do anything it took to protect it. To not let it break into a frown, if Yuuri was sad then he’ll be sad as well. As Victor loved Yuuri so much, he wanted to do his best to make him happy – so he could see that smile and fall in love all over again.

Anything that threatened Yuuri’s ability to smile shall not be forgiven.

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“Mila, remember the story about the girl who do drugs?”

The two Babichieva sisters were sitting on a couch, enjoying late night movies in the television with popcorns and bottles of colas while their parents were outstation. Mila took a caramel-salted popcorn from the big bowl Alina was holding in her hands, eyes still glued to the TV. “Yep. How is she now?”

“She’s currently on rehabilitation,” Alina leaned her back on the couch. “Just as you suggested, we tried to get some help for her, and it worked.”

“That’s good to hear!” Mila clapped her sister’s back. “I’m so proud of you! You made someone’s life better!”

“Yeah, she’s getting better now! And we’re also had become good friends.” Alina smiled.

“Awww.”

Then Alina started to frown. “It turned out she wasn’t that bad like I expected. She’s so nice when you get to know her more.”

“And she even told me why she took drugs.” She continued, which caused Mila to strain her ears for more information.

“Because it’s the only source of happiness she got.” Alina sighed. “Her father sexually abused her, and nobody wanted to help her because they don’t believe her. They thought she was a child with bad behaviour and her father is a two-faced devil who constantly lies, of course people believe him more.”

Mila could tell Alina was fighting back her tears from falling down, from the tone of her voice. “She said when she took drugs, all of her pain, stress and depression are instantly gone. It’s the only thing that made her happy, when everything else hurt her more. It’s the only thing that can make her stop crying.”

“That’s terrible, poor her.  Did her asshole father get what he deserved?” Mila asked.

“Yup, he went to jail! He truly deserves it!”

Mila giggled a bit. “That’s good to hear!”

“You know what, sis? This kinda reminds me of Japanese Yuri.”

“Eh? Why bring him all the sudden?”

“You know,” Alina took a handful of popcorns and stuffed them into her mouth. “I’m scared of him at first. He always glares at people and it’s terrifying. He seemed cold-hearted.”

“Well, he’s not glaring. It’s just he has bad eyesight so he had to narrow his eyes to get a better view around him, when he’s not wearing his glasses.” Mila clarified it.

“I know right? And he’s not cold, but a total sweetheart,” Alina blushed, Mila wondered if there’s a hidden meaning behind her blush. “No wonder Victor’s falling for him.”

Mila said, “He’s cute and I really love to tease him. He’s a good friend to have, unlike a certain guy who also named Yuri…”

“Japanese Yuri is really like the snow. Cold to touch, but warms your heart. Lovely, right?”

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Yuuri opened his eyes.

Under the harsh weather where everything was dark and bleak, it was nothing but ominous. Any signs of lives were absent. Nothing was seen moving and not even a vehicle passed. Not a single sound was heard, the presence of light was ceased and the stars were not there to enrich the dark sky. Alone in the dark and silence where nothingness reigned, was Yuuri himself.

He was lying on the cold ground naked, and he shivered in cold, goosebumps appearing on his skin and thick white puffs of his breath escaped out from his mouth.

“How did I end up here…?”

Yuuri tried to recall everything that happened in the past. He got a fight with Victor, left the house for some fresh air, found a little girl midway… and he found himself here, that’s it. How he could fall asleep here was a mystery, he couldn’t remember anything. And why he was naked? His head was heavy and hurting, his body was limp, he couldn’t move.

Something was falling from the sky.

“Ah, it’s snowing…”

Yuuri lifted his hand, tried to reach it. Snow delicately descended onto his palm, the white snow seemed so clean where everything was tainted in comparison. Yuuri himself, felt dirty compared to the pure white snow. As snow was actually made of frozen water, clear from any impurities. He took a closer look; he could see the tiny shape of snowflake on his hand.

“Beautiful…”

It automatically formed a smile on Yuuri’s face when more snow piled up on his hand. At a sudden he felt something like a spiritual connection to the snow. It might be similar to him by some sort? He remembered those times in his childhood, building a snowman and playing snowball fight with his sister. His younger self tried to build an igloo and failed miserably.

Snow was cold and harsh at a first glance – but it also what kept autumn’s seeds warm and safe until spring. Sure, what hidden underneath the cold snow were the seeds waiting to blossom into colourful flowers when the right time came. Everyone loved snow. Who doesn’t? Cold on the outside, sweet on the inside… just like certain how people could be.

“YUURI!!!”

When Yuuri was too busy admiring the snow, he recognized the voice that snapped him back to reality. “Vitya…?”

Victor cradled the weak and vulnerable Yuuri into his arms; he was downtrodden to see his beloved naked in the cold, he was showered with white fluid all over his body, his entrance was bleeding. Victor took off the trenchcoat he was wearing and made Yuuri wear it instead. Makkachin licked Yuuri’s face smeared with cum to clean it. It tickled him and made him laugh a little.

“Yuuri… are you okay…?” Victor caressed Yuuri’s face. He was saddened to see his fiancé lying broken in his arms.

“Vitya…” Yuuri smiled weakly, “You’re so warm…”

Victor pulled Yuuri closer and hugged him tighter in his arms. The Russian kissed everywhere on the raven’s face, the latter twitched at every kisses. Yuuri’s body felt so cold, making Victor wondering how long he had been left here. The more he sympathized with Yuuri, the more he deemed them unforgivable. Victor also saw something written on Yuuri’s chest, in Russian letters. He involuntarily widened his eyes. His blood boiled.

JAPANESE SLUT

 “Sorry for making you worried that you had to search for me, Vitya… You know how crazy I am when I’m drunk…” Yuuri said.

“Yuuri…” Victor stared at Yuuri in horror, not believing what he said. “You don’t remember what happened to you…?”

“I don’t know how I ended up sleeping here, naked… Maybe I went to a bar and drank too much alcohol...? I usually forget everything I did when I’m drunk…”

“Hope I didn’t do anything crazy this time…” Yuuri nervously chuckled, recalling the traumatic banquet. Still sending chills down his spine every single time.

Victor couldn’t hold it anymore. Tears fell down from his eyes in heavy amount, and Yuuri was confused. “Vitya…? Why are you crying…?”

“Yuuri… My Yuuri…”

“I did something wrong, right…?” Yuuri wiped Victor’s tears with his fingers. “I know I’m the one at fault... I’m sorry for raising my voice at you… when you’re just worried about me…”

“No, Yuuri…” Victor sobbed harder as he held Yuuri close to him. “I’m the foolish one for hurting your feelings. I’m sorry… You don’t deserve any of this!”

“I won’t forgive them.”

“Eh…?”

Yuuri was startled when he found himself suddenly floating upwards, the only solid thing he was in contact to was Victor, where the rest around him were just air. Oh, he got it. Victor was scooping him up, now the Russian was carrying the raven in his arms and started walking to wherever he wanted to. Makkachin followed him from behind.

“Vitya –“

“Don’t speak anymore.” Victor firmly cut him. “I’m taking you to the hospital.”

Yuuri wrapped his arms around Victor’s neck and leaned on his chest. He watched around, now snow was falling more than before, the whole place was now partly covered with snow. The snow was actively falling around them like heavy rain, just like a scene straight from a fairy tale. The throbbing pain he felt in his head and bottom was almost forgettable.

Victor was so warm. Yuuri buried his face into the Russian’s neck and deeply inhaled. He smelled good. Smelling exactly like Victor and the expensive body lotion he always used. Chinese Mulberry shrub, Japanese seaweed and Moon Flower fragrance. Victor’s warmth and sweet smell made him grew increasingly drowsy; it felt so good he couldn’t help it.

Yuuri closed his eyes and fell asleep. Noticing this, Victor paused to admire his personal Sleeping Beauty’s face. Yuuri looked peaceful while sleeping in his arms; surely he won’t feel any pain at this state. He gently planted a kiss on his forehead, while making a new vow to protect him so he wouldn’t get hurt again.

Victor tightened his hold around Yuuri and carried on walking.

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“…So that’s why Yuuri doesn’t remember anything?”

The doctor nodded, while flipping some papers from a clipboard from Yuuri’s bed. “The drug they used against him will cause amnesia; he won’t remember what happened to him after he took the drug.”

Yuuri in a hospital gown was soundly sleeping on the bed, IV infused in his arm and his chest slowly moved up and down in a rhythm. His eyes remained closed as his long, dark eyelashes were more visible above his face. He was pale and his lips were chapped and purple, his cheeks reddened due to the fever he had after being exposed to the cold for so long.

“Such drug exists?!” Yakov couldn’t believe it. “It’s good thing that Katsuki won’t get any trauma from this, but…”

“Drugs like this are commonly used by rapists to their victims, so they won’t recognize their faces. Cases like this are very common for a long time.”

“The people who did that to him are now free, just like that?” Yurio was angered.

Mila was crying, Lilia was beside the redhead to comfort her. “Why is this happening to Yuuri?! Poor him…”

“Does his family in Japan know about his condition?” The doctor asked.

Victor who was sitting at a chair beside the bed, firmly held Yuuri’s hand in his. He didn’t know what to answer. He hadn’t told the Katsuki about Yuuri yet, but it wasn’t impossible they would know it beforehand, as Minako and the Nishigoris were there, both were active in social media. And considering Yuuri’s reputation, probably it was all over the figure skating news now.

The doctor took it as a no, he wanted to believe for the better as well.

Georgi sighed. “But why he’s not waking up? It had been three days.”

“Right?!” Yurio exclaimed, “And Four Continents is getting close! He couldn’t make it if things are going on like this!”

“Some drugs are strong enough to make the victims fall into a coma. And some can even cause death.”

The doctor was calm, but it made everyone in the ward condemned into silence. His words as if were telling them to consider that Yuuri was lucky enough to still breathing to this day. But the doctor only just explained why he was in a coma, nothing more. As his injuries were also minor, all they need to do now was waiting him to wake up.

Yakov stood up from his seat. “Come on, Vitya. It’s time for practice.”

Victor was still unmoving. Yakov added, “I understand how you feel. But there’s nothing much we can do here. We could only pray for the best.”

“Of course there’s something I could do,” Victor tensed.

“Yakov, I’m retiring.”

Everyone was shocked, including the doctor himself who knew nothing about figure skating. Victor came out with another surprise again this time. This was a heavy decision to make, once he decided to retire there’s no way he could return to skating competitively anymore. Was this young man insane or what? He always made spontaneous decisions without thinking about the consequences.

“Stop fooling around, Vitya! You –“

“Do I look like I’m fooling around to you…?”

If even Yakov, the demonic coach known for his super strict lectures was scared, then nobody should try to bring out this side of Victor if they wanted to live longer. Yurio was trembling, and Lillia was nervous. Victor’s tone and appearance were calm – but even the calmest lake could hide the carnivorous piranhas that will violently gobble their prey in split seconds.

“What are you going to do, then? Why do you want to retire?” Mila asked.

“I want to be Yuuri’s full-time coach. After all, coaching and competing are too much for me. Not only it’s tiring, I don’t get to be with Yuuri’s side when he needs it as well. And this happened to him when I was idle.”

Lillia casted a motherly look. “If it’s for both of their happiness then you shouldn’t say no, Yakov.”

Victor added, “And me and Yuuri are not going to stay in Russia ever again.”

The silver-waned made his decision, and he won’t have any regrets. Even if everyone against it, he doesn’t care. It’s time for him to care about his own happiness, which he was the only one who can decide for. Victor was tired of doing things for someone else in his whole life before meeting Yuuri, now he made up his mind to move to Hasetsu and live there forever with him.

“I think Russia is not welcoming of Yuuri’s presence after all. If they hate Yuuri because of me, then I’m not going back here and to skating anymore. Serves them right.”

Victor was right, and nobody could prove it’s the other way around. Slowly more people began to leave the ward, leaving him alone with Yuuri. Their presence and absence were both unnoticed as Victor kept a keen eye on the sleeping Yuuri, fearing that disaster will strike if he removed his eyes from him again. Victor placed his hand on Yuuri’s forehead, he was still burning.

When Victor dampened a cloth with water to wipe Yuuri’s face with it, a little girl came into the ward with a large bouquet of flowers in her hand. Along with her was an adult woman, whom Victor assumed was her mother.

“I’m sorry…” the little girl placed the flowers down on the cabinet. She approached Yuuri and kissed him on the cheek.

Victor smiled. “Thanks for the flowers. Are you a fan of him?”

With those large eyes of hers packed with tears and guilt, she faced towards him.

“I know who did that to him.”

♥.·:*¨¨*:·.♥.·:*:·.♥.·:*¨¨*:·.♥ ♥.·:*¨¨*:·.♥.·:*:·.♥.·:*¨¨*:·.♥ ♥.·:*¨¨*:·.♥.·:*:·.♥.·:*¨¨*:·.♥

_“Victor, I promise I will get the gold medal in World Championships. Just believe in me!”_

Yuuri was forced to withdraw from Four Continents, but it was recently announced that he will be competing in Worlds with the enough points he already accumulated. Victor gently brushed the raven’s hair from his face. Now Yuuri started to sweat a little bit, though still feverish. The silver-waned glad that he managed to send the rapists to the police thanks to the little girl’s help.

“Yuuri, as soon as you wake up, I have a lot to tell you. And all of them are good news.”

But his tears were falling down. Why?

“I won’t go anywhere; I’ll always be there for you. I’ll never let go of your hand.”

Yuuri’s eyes were still closed. Time had never felt so slow to Victor nowadays. How long he had to wait, it felt like forever to him. His family and friends kept asking about his wellbeing, and Victor doesn’t know how to answer them. Everyone was worried. They all were sad. Nobody was ready to lose him yet. Yuuri was only serenely sleeping, but it’s too cruel for people who cared for him.

“I love you so much. And so do everyone.”

Victor squeezed Yuuri’s hand tighter. “So I beg of you… Please come back.”

“Are you actually scared to see everyone again, that you don’t want to wake up?”

Victor took Yuuri’s hand and kissed his fingers. “There’s no reason for you to be scared anymore – as I swear I will protect you, I won’t let anyone hurt you.”

“I’ll be the one to turn your fear into courage. Instead of you fearing others, you’ll be the one they fear then.”

He leaned forward – slightly opened his mouth and his lips met with the raven’s dried ones. Victor closed his eyes; time froze as the exchange of love was played, as if a desperate plea for the return of a loved one. Yuuri’s warmth was still there, he was still alive nevertheless and it was the same Yuuri – but the only thing lacked was him to show that smile again. Is it too much to ask?

The Russian reluctantly pulled away.

 “It’s okay – this time, you won’t face your problems all by yourself. We’re going to shoulder it together. We’re going to share your pain altogether, as long you’re with me you wouldn’t be alone anymore. I won’t ever let you go.”

“I don’t mind doing everything for you – as now I live to love you forever.”

The brown doe eyes were looking back at him.

“Victor…?”

 

THE END

**Author's Note:**

> The end. Yayyy xD It went longer than I expected. I was thinking of a bittersweet ending but it seems like a happy ending now???
> 
> Anyhow, the method used to lure a victim by using a child depicted here is real. It had been done in my country where a child will lead an unassuming victim to a certain address, where the attackers are waiting for their new prey. Yikes, better be careful.
> 
> Thanks for reading :D


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